Cinnamon Buns, Stereotypes, Degrees

When you have all the time in the world you might just walk around in a tourist area for an hour going into multiple coffee shops looking for a cinnamon bun. When I finally found one I had to choose a place to sit. There was a comfortable looking seat by the window but it was also right across from the washrooms where people unleash their holy hell. The worst of humanity takes place behind locked doors where people at most can only suspect that you are the culprit. The person after you needs a face to put to the urine soaked toilet seat but he knows it could have been from 20 other men before you. Maybe that putrid smell came from your back end but it’s possible it’s been lingering for the last hour. No one knows so no one says anything. All one can do is give the stink eye letting one know of their suspicions.

While sitting at the table where the students congregate, my wandering eyes inspected their study materials. Two young Asian guys appearing to be studying, with headphones in their ears. Maybe they’re listening to Tony Robbins or maybe they’re listening to death metal songs about killing their parents. Surprise surprise…one of them was studying Mechatronic Systems Engineering and the other had his textbook at the chapter of Cash Flow so I’ll assume he’s in the accounting field.┬áStereotypes exist for a reason.


Practicality is the name of the game. If you’re going to spend 4 years and $50,000 on a university degree then you might just want to get something out of it besides a piece of high class toilet paper signed by the dean. A university degree can be a symbol of your worthy achievement or a reminder that you got duped.

Daily Post: Degree


The Reality of Life

There might be no rule book to life but it’s apparent to me now that your degree of success is dependent on your grasp of reality and your willingness to surrender to it.

I spent most of life wanting life to cater to how I wanted it to be not because I was convicted in my beliefs but because I was uncomfortable with the alternative. Hope and time was on my side, so I felt, which led me to do nothing much. The truth always was that if you want something you have to make it happen and there’s always some kind of risk associated with it. Hope is completely imaginary when there is nothing behind it.

Life hasn’t worked out for an abundance of people out there and many of them opt for the road of excuses. You can blame immigration, family or some other external factor but in all likelihood there was something in your timeline you could have easily improved. There’s excuses and then there’s what really happened. To be forgiving though, sometimes you just didn’t know any better.

If you bring a baseball bat to a hockey game you’re either going to fail or not even be allowed to play. You can be as stubborn as you like but it’s highly unlikely the rules are going to change in your favour. Keep bringing that baseball bat and you’ll keep failing.

I don’t know how things “should” be but I have a better idea how I’d like them to be, and then there’s how it is.

The Morning Routine

During my working days in a previous life the alarm clock(phone) went off at 7:30 AM with the snooze option often making a appearance. I hope for it to be a day later than what I think it is but it’s rarely the case. As I silently go through an arsenal of cuss words and a seemingly hopeless maze of negative thoughts I make the first move to a vertical position. As I sit on the edge of my bed it reminds me how all of it is strikingly similar to sitting on the edge of a tall building contemplating your options. If you do it enough, one day you probably will jump.

I’ve been doing this routine for years. I have it down to a publicly traded corporation’s dream of efficiency. I put 2 eggs in a stainless steel pot, fill it with hot water and place it on the stove on high. While the water is heating up I brush my teeth, wash the snot from my eyes and shave(maybe). By the time I put on my slave attire the water is boiling, I turn the heat down to 6 and calculate the time 7 minutes from now.

As I wait for the eggs I sit on my drum throne listening to the AM radio. There’s always traffic nightmare. I’m at least thankful that I’m a 5 minute drive from work. It’s not a lucky coincidence, I plan this shit.

I peel my medium-boiled eggs like a pro and have a banana afterwards. Not the greatest breakfast but I need to eat something or I’ll be left dizzy. 8:12 AM I’m out the door. More cuss words to come if it’s pissing rain.



WordPress Graveyard

If you’re on WordPress long enough it’s inevitable that someone you follow will pass away. It happened a few months ago and again today. There may have been others who died but didn’t get the chance to have a final post published with their writing or from someone they know.

I’m not sure if I prefer to know of their deaths or not. Without any last words I would assume they just stopped blogging and wouldn’t think much of it again. A death notice is always an interesting read but also sad.

If it was me who was in his last days I wouldn’t be able to help myself. You don’t get another opportunity to write and publish a post in such a mindset.

Unlikely Sources of Enlightenment

It’s easy to fall into negativity because it’s a survival mechanism. Having ambitions way past your current situation triggers a danger response. In the background there’s always a silent voice coercing you into doing the thing that has been known to get people by. You become your environment and the common environment is not very inspiring. If anything it’s depressing.

There’s inspirational/motivational/rational speeches and videos that are part of my routine although not my daily routine. I see them more as my religion than I do self-help or motivation.

As much as I believe in what they have to say, not being surrounded by others who believe what you do as deeply as you do diminishes the potential of the possibilities. Being the lone attendee at a powerful sermon does not make for a spiritual environment that lingers on. Instead, you might look around, see no one and think you’re a fool. Power in numbers.

There’s this guy on YouTube who looks like a meathead but has some inspiring videos. I watch one of his videos regularly and try to burn his words into my brain.

“…don’t complain about it, don’t whine about, don’t tell other people how destitute you are. You followed your heart. You own your heart and balls. Now eat the cake associated with it. That’s the problem. People want to follow their hearts but they also want the guarantee of the traditional path.”

“…you will be cast out, you will be a weirdo, you will be eccentric, it’s just the way of the heart. But it will be your way.”

“…the difference is that the traditional path has a ladder of success, you can look at it, go to college, get a career…which is no longer a reality. It’s a hope. It’s a wish. Get a pension plan, retire, blah blah blah. There’s a linear approach. When you start following your heart there’s no guarantee. You don’t know where that motherfucker is going to take you.”

It’s true. You don’t know where that motherfucker is going to take you.

Holding On

When the ride of life feels as if it’s running on fumes you agonize where it will leave you. A vehicle once filled with sufficient fuel welcomed all passengers and journeys is now stripped to its bare bones leaving the driver to aimlessly navigate in solitude.

Belief is the essential additive that fuels the daily driver through its everyday journey whether to worthy ambitions or blind madness. Like a desperate illusion of a mirage the mind will search for any belief to grasp onto in order to convince you to continue on in a situation which seems past grim.

Most will accept the partially stale gas because it’s better than nothing. It may or may not get you to where you want to go but it’ll keep you going. A little bit of crazy is what is needed to survive what is mostly a long flat road that seemingly degrades over time and ends with you driving over a cliff one way or another.

Phone Culture

If I wasn’t getting a free meal and beer I might have been annoyed with the 3 of them at a pub all staring into their phones. Before smartphones you would have to entertain each other by saying something or doing something, sometimes almost forcibly.┬áThe phone appears to be a device to entertain yourself and if entertaining enough you say, “look at this.” After a second of acknowledgement the head comes back down. One was looking at shopping flyers while the other 2 were scrolling through social media or playing a game. If I had to guess though, this is something that happens more so with the younger generation.

I’ve recently been active on Twitter with the 18 people who I follow and my 2 followers. It’s possible half of my followers accidentally touched the follow button. With 18 people there’s more action than I can keep up with. Now it makes sense to me how people can have their faces in their phones all day, liking, tweeting, retweeting, scrolling. Some people follow hundreds of people and have hundreds of followers.

Twitter is just one platform. Many people also have Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat and maybe a few others. Most of life for some people is lived through their phones. It’s easy and constant entertainment.

Everyone is trying to participate to get some kind of validation with a witty one-liner, meme or a photo that they may or may not have taken themselves. A life fuelled by strangers. Guaranteed you’ll find someone out there to connect with, perhaps enough that you’ll give up doing it the old fashioned way.