Non-active Gym Membership

When doing the math, $4.99 plus tax every 2 weeks on a 1 year commitment could only be so bad. I suspect this gym had the same idea. A week after I signed up for the gym membership I crashed my car which resulted in a total loss. I walked to the gym a few times after but eventually gave it up. Now I’m the best type of customer that they have…one who pays but never goes. The bad customers take up space, stink up the place and contribute to wear and tear of the equipment. They should throw customer appreciation parties for customers like me.

It’s a classic case of human behaviour. Optimism is at its highest when an idea is just an idea. People often rationalize the high likelihood that they will commit. Everything works in theory. Once the idea requires physical effort it no longer seems like such a good idea. Now you rationalize ways on how it’s okay to stop going and how the money that will be wasted isn’t that much. You tell yourself that walking your dog is plenty of exercise and the money wasted is only half of what you received for Christmas. I’d like to see the stats of active memberships versus non-active. I’m sure it’s part of the business plan.

There’s a reason why businesses make you sign contracts. They know that people are losers and will often fall into the trap of convenience and laziness. When video stores were around they thrived on late fees. People would often put off returning videos until the last day and when that day came they forgot or their house burned down. With enough life experience you start to say “no” to every enticing offer not because it’s not a good deal but because you know your loser tendencies. Accepting offers are often a bet with yourself.

In the past I have made good use of my gym memberships but it just didn’t happen this time. It’s just been too inconvenient without a vehicle(excuse). I do mini-workouts by randomly dropping and giving myself 20 or doing pull-ups on the monkey bars when there’s no children around. I still have half a year to redeem myself with my gym membership so we’ll see what happens(rationalizing hope).

 

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SaTURDay, May 2017…Dear Diary

On a nearby street there was an A-board sign outside of a house advertising palm readings for $10. At least there was because when I was looking for it today to get my palm read the house appeared to be gone…demolished to be a future mansion. I don’t believe in palm readings but the experience would have been amusing. I’ll have to go by there again in case I missed it.

There’s a farm by my place that sells eggs and vegetables. They also have goats and cows.

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The woman working there doesn’t speak English very well so there’s a communication issue between us.

“Can I play with the goats?”

She replied, “Okay, do you want to buy some kale?”

I didn’t get to play with the goats but I bought some kale. She might be a good salesperson.

What’s for dinner? I guess I’ll have kale and eggs. Maybe she changed my life.

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I’ll be going to bed hungry

Say what you want about eating healthy but when you do it feels like you’re one with the universe. You don’t get this lousy feeling afterwards like your body is processing sludge.

Probiotics may be all the rage. I’m not sure because I have no idea what other people are doing these days. From different podcasts and radio interviews though it sounds like gut health extends to other functions of the body such as mental health. It sounds like BS but people who appear to be smart seem to really believe this.

A segment on the news had something on how most types of yogurts are not the probiotic champions that they pretend to be. They said Kefir is a more generous probiotic product. I take a couple swigs a day. I have reason to believe that my gut has been healthier since the introduction of kefir. That’s all the information I’m willing to give you on that thesis.

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I’ve been told that one of the local Buddhist temples serves free lunch. The catch is that they want you to come in a bit earlier so that they can give you a speech which is also free. I’m okay with that because I like Buddhist teachings. I’m sure they’re gunning for some money eventually.

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His busking skills didn’t pay for this

It’s 9 PM and I’m ready to kiss the dog goodnight and go to bed already.

The Placebo Effect

Recently I’ve been entertaining the possibility that it’s healthier to be happy than it is to be healthy. Warren Buffett is 86 years old, eats fast food and is mostly sedentary. His two wives are dead but he’s still sharp as a nail doing televised interviews and making successful billion dollar transactions. He claims he’s lived a happy life because he lived every day doing what he wanted to do. I suppose $85 billion doesn’t hurt either.

Donald Trump is also a fast food eater because he believes, “at least you know what they put in it.” The guy is basically a 70-year-old active stand-up comedian doing more gigs than Louis C.K. When you think you’re the greatest man walking on the planet you must be pretty happy.

Apparently the placebo effect is real even though it seems as close to hocus pocus as you can get. What you believe though can be the core of your energy and spirit. I don’t believe hangovers at 40 years of age are any harder than at 20. When you’re 20 you just power through everything because you think you’re supposed to. Once the belief dies all the lights turn off with it.

Trying to counter the potential health pitfalls of my loneliness and melancholy with homemade vegetable soup and 2 hour walks might not be the path to healthy longevity. If it’s all in the mind I’m better off lying to myself(thinking positive) and eating McDonald’s.

I can see how evolution would favour those who are happy. If you’re always happy it means you’re doing the right things in life. If you’re not then the universe may want you to get sick and die since you’re already waiting to die anyway.

 

Lazy Nutrition

If I’m going to be trapped in this body for awhile then I should try to keep it running properly. With a bad diet comes aches, lethargy and possibly premature death(might not be a bad thing). A diet consisting of mostly plant based foods is the ideal way to eat for optimum health and just like with most things in life there’s always a drawback. Fruits and vegetables are good for you but they are not as fun as french fries with gravy, doughnuts, cake, pie, danishes or chocolate hedgehogs.

As much as I like smooth bowel movements and antioxidants, eating vegetables often feels like a chore. They don’t taste that good. Some people will say vegetables are delicious but that’s only after cooking and pouring sauce over them. The main attraction on the dinner table is never green and vitamin rich. You don’t impress anyone by inviting them to a gourmet broccoli dinner. Salads come at the beginning of the meal because you want to get it out of the way…it’s like finishing your homework before you can get dessert and can go out to play. People like the mood to have an upward trajectory.

Soups are a very efficient method for getting sufficient nutrients. You chop everything up, throw it in a pot and you’re set for a few days. With big supermarkets and small produce stores discounting the prices of almost expired vegetables you can brew up a big pot of soup for cheap.

Today’s special consists of pork neck bones, head of cauliflower, leek, celery root, celery sticks, carrots, brown turnip, radishes, mushrooms, red pepper. I couldn’t even fit all of the vegetables in the bowl! I believe if I didn’t dice them all up they wouldn’t have fit in the pot. I should have added some spices and herbs.

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This post may save your life or at least your digestive system.

 

Marijuana as a Sleep Aid

I ran out of the cannabis oil that the old guy gave me awhile ago and without a license of any kind to attain legal or quasi-legal cannabis oil, my only other option is to make my own. Having never made it myself one can turn to the internet to get their feet wet in any trade.

With a few grams of marijuana I had stashed away I used one gram to experiment. Using calculations from the internet I produced a small amount of cannabis coconut oil. To figure out an adequate dosage took some general estimation and me being my own guinea pig.

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It looks like a small amount but the effects of edible cannabis is about 5 times stronger than when cannabis is smoked. It has something to do with the liver processing the THC. This 30 gram batch contains 15-20 small doses.

The reason why I went to the trouble of making this is because I’ve always found marijuana to be a great sleep aid. I don’t like the process of having to smoke it nor do I like some of the effects it gives me. Some people like warm milk and a bedtime story, I like cannabis.

Last night I tried a small dose of my creation and it was a success. Today I felt great. I mean, exceptionally better than 99% of other days. I wasn’t high, I was just in a good mood and there wasn’t a point in the day when I wanted to take a nap. I wasn’t on top of the world or anything. If someone kicked me in the balls I’d still be pissed off about it.

It’s difficult to be hungry and happy, sick and happy or tired and happy. Good health, food and sleep are the fundamentals to feeling good.

 

 

 

About Eggs

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There’s a farm within walking distance from my home. They have cows, goats and chickens but they only sell eggs. The guy told me the cows are there just to eat grass. Maybe he produces blu-ray quality farm animal porn.

I ask the lady to give me a giant egg every time I come by because I get a kick out of looking at them and showing them to people. I used to feel guilty about eating more than a few eggs a week because of the junk science that too many eggs in your diet would explode your heart.

For a few years I was eating 16 eggs a week. During that time a nutritionist tested my cholesterol levels and they were normal. She freaked out when I told her the amount of eggs that I ate.

It wasn’t until the recent past that I found out chickens can lay eggs without having a male chicken do his song and dance to get inside of her. If a chicken is raised with care, shouldn’t their unfertilized eggs be considered vegan friendly?

 

 

 

 

The Messiness of Healthiness

Daily Prompt: Health
We treat health like how professional athletes treat money…we think it will never run out. When it does we end up sounding like old people giving advice to young whippersnappers.

Without the healthometer being invented yet it’s difficult to decipher what is healthy and what is not. One alcoholic drink a day doesn’t sound so bad but maybe it is if you have wussy genetics.

In 2016 there’s still people out there who think smoking cigarettes has no potential for ill effects on your health. Nonsense, my grandfather smoked his whole life and he died at 80. They like to believe that one has no control over how long or healthy they live so that they can do whatever they want. Ignorance is bliss.

If you wanted to be 99% geared towards a healthy life you would have to get yourself into a Buddhist monk monastery but then there’s the theory one’s life is shortened when void of fun.

There’s a good percentage of people who believe their unhealthy lifestyle may be the end of them but their motto is that they don’t want to live a life of resistance having to restrict stimulation or comfort. They want to enjoy their life.

Once both extremes are explored we often decide moderation is the key except that we tend to eat potato chips moderately every day. If we do end up with health issues we want to believe we didn’t do it to ourselves and that by being more conscious of our health during our lifetime wouldn’t have been a life worth living.

Taking care of your health is good for you but so damn boring. Bad health isn’t so bad except when you have to live and suffer from it. Unfortunately, we never go from healthy to dead. We usually have to suffer before we are rewarded with death.