Closeted Memories

When the closet flooded a few weeks ago I emptied it out and when it was time to put everything back in I was curious as to what was inside the storage totes.


It was 1994 when I bought this at a martial arts store in Chinatown. The one thing I learned from it is that the best way to defend yourself is to run or get a tattoo on your face…intimidation goes a long way.

A Bruce Lee fascination for a guy is like puberty…it’s going to come one day. I rented all the movies including the ones with the fake Bruce Lees like Bruce Ly and Bruce Le. Back in those pre-internet days it was easy to sucker people. At night I would do stretches, punch paper and make funny noises not knowing that I was wasting my time. Again, in the pre-internet days there was a lot of time to waste but not many easy ways to do it. I could have done homework but I purposely left that at school so I wouldn’t have to worry about it.

With over 300,000 copies sold in 1994 I don’t think it will be a collector’s item. If I had put that $14 into Starbucks stock instead I would have about $1000 today. Historical data can show you how you clearly screwed up in life.


This photo of my aunt and I was something I don’t remember ever seeing. It would have made a great photo for the purposes of finding an affluent white couple to adopt me. Unfortunately it never happened so I ended up being raised eating processed Kraft cheese instead of imported Havarti aged for 3 months. I could have had my very own cheese knife with my name engraved on it. I ended up living a life using a non-name brand, dull steak knife for all knife situations as well as a multi-purpose tool.

It’s a nice picture so I decided to display it in the living room.


One comment on “Closeted Memories

  1. Mr.Johnsons' Possibly Insane Cousin says:

    I thought I was the only one in the family who rented those Bruce Le/Ly videos. Some of the camera work on those videos were horrendous. Two guys would be fighting each other and part of the top of their heads would not be in the scene. That is a nice picture, is it staying out or back in the tote? My guess is the tote.


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