For most of life our wiring needed to be set at a fairly early age in order for us to have the best chances of survival. It’s only in recent times that the life expectancy of humans is what it is. You wouldn’t design a product for today to suit the unforeseeable future when the present time is already so uncertain.
When an adult has trouble fitting the norms of what society sees as healthy, it is almost always thought to have stemmed from their childhood environment. Those first 10-15 years lay down the blueprints for the path that the universe apparently wants to push you towards.
Once you’re out of the assembly line and dished out to the world and its users, your specifications and programming determine your value and limitations. If you’ve never loved or received love during production then that program will not exist in your system. A system that has been coded with minor amounts of love is possible but it would be the equivalent of calling Solitaire a video game.
Someone may come along and try to install some improved programming into you but most people would rather find a system that already has it installed especially if it’s widely available on the market. Users tend to only use and there are far more users than there are programmers.
Realizing the root of your undesirable traits that cause you and others grief is your first step towards possible redemption. You might not be at absolute fault for the person you are but blaming your issues on others who have only done a cameo appearance in your life is expecting them to clean up someone else’s poorly created production.