Unexciting Daily Happenings

Sometimes the only difference between reality TV and blogs is that no one cares about your blog.

My day started with a disgusting smoothie. My usual breakfast smoothie consists of an orange, banana, coconut oil and hemp protein powder. To make it more healthy/disgusting, I added sauerkraut, turmeric and a bunch of kale. I couldn’t finish it. I think I put too much sauerkraut but the kale was gross too.

Sauerkraut = probiotic
Turmeric = anti-inflammatory/anti-oxidant
Kale = I don’t know, because it’s green and supposed to be good for you?

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Came across this lovely image during my work day. From half a block a way I thought it might have been a yard sale. Arriving at the site made it conclusive that this was someone’s way of getting rid of their excess clutter. Someone took a big dump.

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Over the weekend I decided to do some decluttering myself. I listed this keyboard/mouse combo under the ‘free’ section of Craigslist. I had like 10 responses in the first hour. My best guess is that they ran some kind of computer retail business and were looking to resell it for money. Someone picked it up that same day. I’ve been advertising my love for 35 years and there’s still no takers. Maybe I just need to throw in a keyboard/mouse combo to sweeten the deal.

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I’ve owned this hat since 2007. I liked it because it had a Velcro type strap and the years of sun and sweat gave it a nice fade. It was brought to my attention that it looked unsanitary. I couldn’t see this myself at first but I guess I was blinded by love. I threw it in the washing machine with the rest of my laundry one day and it came out like this. At first I thought of how fashionable it looked then I put it on, looked in the mirror and realized it might need to be retired.

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Distressed

There’s a section in where I deliver parcels that has these little libraries. It’s a fairly new phenomenon. It’s such a nice part of life that it almost makes me want to puke. It makes me think of flowers, sunshine, Ned Flanders and small children pulling their small sibling in a wagon. I’m glad to see the honour system is still alive. I may put a dirty magazine in there for fun. No no I won’t do that. Maybe just the bra section from the weekly Sears flyer.

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The Kardashians may have an edge on me now but one day,Β Keeping up with Mr Johnson will be all the rage.

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17 comments on “Unexciting Daily Happenings

  1. lisafab says:

    I hate to be the bearer (that doesn’t look like I spelled it right) of bad news…but unfortunately, the honor system is hard to find these days…My friends in Kansas have one of these little free library’s in their front yard and she posts quite a bit on facebook when ever the library is “wiped clean” of books with no books left behind…Yes, in KANSAS! So please, as a former librarian, please only leave books in these little libraries….my heart begs you!
    p.s. I liked your line about advertising your love for 35 yrs…maybe add a mouse & keyboard…totally made me laugh! =)

    Like

    • MrJohnson says:

      I said the honour system is alive not alive and well…lol. That’s sad how they get cleaned out. I am sure it happens here as well. Probably teenagers.

      I only added that line as further advertisement for my love but was hiding it behind humour so I look less shameless.

      Like

  2. steffietopia says:

    Hahaha, your unexciting daily happenings just brightened up my day XD

    Like

  3. Jami says:

    You make me chuckle. πŸ™‚ hey smoothie: I like kale and bananas and almond milk. Maybe just spoon down the oil and other stuff so you can enjoy your smoothie? But hey, good for you for taking care of yourself. Really. πŸ™‚

    I send a wish of love to you, that it comes right your way.

    Like

    • MrJohnson says:

      I used to use kale all the time. It was bearable. Bananas are always a must in every stage of smoothie evolution. I used almond milk for a bit but I was disappointed with the lack of almond content. The hemp protein powder doesn’t taste very good but I can’t give it up because of all the nutrients.

      Ya, I try to incorporate health consciousness throughout my day. I’m afraid to get scurvy or rickets. Thanks for the wish of love. Hope you’re doing well over there.

      Like

  4. BerLinda says:

    I’d watch that show πŸ™‚ But you might need to cut down on the kale to get your ass up to Kardashian proportions πŸ˜‰ And yes, I’ll have you, a mouse and a keyboard please – no deal without the latter two…

    Like

    • MrJohnson says:

      I wish I had more meat on my ass. I hate how it gets sore so quickly at the movie theatres.

      Well then, I’ll pick you up for dinner at 6 someday with keyboard and mouse in hand. They last longer than flowers.

      Liked by 1 person

      • BerLinda says:

        Far more practical. I kill flowers as soon as I look at them. I’m staying in my friend’s room for a month and slowly murdering every plant she has – unintentionally. It’s just a gift πŸ˜‰

        Like

  5. Mr.Johnson's Cousin says:

    Hey Cous, maybe you’re not advertising yourself in the right places but with all the stuff you give away for free on craigslist maybe you could include some items in your personal ads, even if it’s just for a joke….Guess you didn’t google on how to clean a dirty cap……..I think those community libraries would work in true small communities where everyone knew each other, but otherwise the best idea I have seen for something that is a similar is a community fridge for the homeless
    http://www.bbc.com/news/blogs-news-from-elsewhere-27296489……What would keeping up with Mr. Johnson entail?

    Like

  6. Those alfresco mini-libraries are just so cool. I wish we had them here, too, so I’d know what to do with all the self-help books I had accumulated in my twenties.

    Like

    • MrJohnson says:

      Ah, self-help books. If only life were that easy. I have a few of those kicking around that I haven’t read. I had one that was kind of embarrassing so I just gave it to charity. It was something about ‘how to talk to people and make them like you.’

      Liked by 2 people

      • “How to talk to people and make them like you” — I’ve had those, too, plus a few that were even more embarrassing. They never worked for me at all.
        Why didn’t they come up with “How A Misanthrope Can Learn To Like People Without Talking To Them” or something like that. It would have been far more helpful for someone like me.

        Like

  7. Another great and funny post by you. Loving the pictures. And am definitely on board with sweetening the deal.

    Like

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