They say you only need 1 or 2 real friends in life and that if you have way more than that, most of those people are probably not very good friends. The reason for this is because there’s not enough resources to go around to satisfy everyone.
When you are associated with a large group of friends it becomes tribal and also similar to the environment of a workplace that employs a large number of people. The company only has so many positions available and some of them are deemed somewhat undesirable and replaceable. The ones who hold more valuable positions receive more compensation and the ones who hold less valuable positions receive less. If the company starts to suffer financially they will get rid of the ones who are of less use. When the dollars were rolling in they could keep the less useful ones around but once things aren’t so great it’s a different story. All of a sudden you’re only a contractor instead of a permanent employee.
In a workplace with a large number of people the name of the game is to please who can benefit you while also trying to give the appearance to everyone else that you are a good person. It’s the same in a large group of friends. Each person generally wants the most they can get from the group while also wanting everyone to like them as well.
To be a person with many friends, you have to have the resources to satisfy these friends. The reason why we only want 1 or 2 close friends is because that’s all that most people can afford. You likely don’t have enough time, talents, money or influence to keep so many friends. If you’re super rich with connections then everybody wants to be your friend.
If you’re a person lacking sufficient resources, it’s impossible to please a large number of people and have them to be considered close as well. You’re like a business that is small and can only take on so much work. Any extra work you can’t handle has to be rejected.
The dynamics of a workplace, large family and a large group of friends are the same. Without a strict philosophy or code, the structure and changes will flow in the same direction as human nature.
“A man that is a friend to everyone is an enemy to himself”
– Mike Tyson