Whether people realize it or not, the whole point of life is to not feel like a loser. To be more specific the goal is to not be near the end of your life and to think that your life was sub-par because you were incompetent. The definition of a loser is subjective but to feel like one you have to feel ashamed of your life. Often, one will feel like a loser if they think the majority of society thinks they are a loser.
Your life at this very moment is probably not that bad. Your life at almost any moment is usually not that bad but then you start thinking about where you are in life and where you want to be or thought you would be, and that puts a damper on things. You feel that there is this mountain to climb and fruits to pick on the way up but you’re not sure if you are going to finish the course or if you even want to. Not completing this trek will make you feel like a loser.
Everything we do in life is fueled by the belief that it is going to make us happier or at least feel better about ourselves. This road to happiness is really just our way of trying to get as far as we can from feeling like a loser. It’s quite possible that you are not doing the things that you are doing for the purpose of happiness. You might think you are but not really. You are doing them because you think it won’t make you feel like a loser, and you think that will bring you the everlasting happiness you are looking for. Happiness is an emotion that doesn’t last like any other emotion such as anger and sadness. To feel any emotion for a prolonged period means there is something wrong with you. Not feeling like a loser on the other hand is just an answer to an equation that satisfies you. If you think working your job + having kids will make you less of a loser then the answer is correct to you but it doesn’t necessarily mean it will make you happy.
Not wanting to feel like a loser is part of the human condition to perpetuate the species and increase the chances of survival for yourself and your loved ones. What usually makes people feel like a loser? Being broke and alone, right? What often happens when you are broke and alone? No one is fucking you and you fear for your survival. And just because you’re not broke or alone, it doesn’t mean you’re happy but you feel less of a loser.
One of the biggest fears that people have is having the feeling that you wasted your life. The feeling that you could have lived a less loserish life if you just did something a little bit different or maybe a lot different. You want to look back on your life when you are old and be able to give yourself the nod of approval. Most of the time, you can only approve if you think everyone else would approve. Life wants you to do and think like everyone else.
All of this is primitive thinking. So what if you die as a so called bonafied loser? It really doesn’t matter except maybe to you but your life alone is just a drop of water in the ocean. Even if you are a so called winner, once you die no one is going to give a shit about you. Do you know the guy who invented the internal combustion engine? Of course you don’t because he’s dead now and no one cares, not even people who work on combustion engines for a living. Do you think you will do anything as great as he did? Do you think your 2 kids, house and 10 exotic vacations can even compare?
So I don’t know if there is any sense in worrying about finishing a loser. Logically there really isn’t any reason but like I’ve said before, humans don’t operate on logic. If you don’t end up being a ‘winner’ then you really just have to ease up on the ego and hopefully have a sense of humour about things.
“I just love that there are people like that ..that are living these wild lives. It’s so different than anything we have locked in our head as acceptable. It’s hard to let go of the idea but it’s really right there in front of your face..it doesn’t matter what you do, you just do what you want to do..you should do what you want to do. We’re all going die anyway. We live and we die…and you just got to accept that but it’s so hard to do.”
– Joe Rogan