Wanting to have kids is selfish

Yesterday, I was having a conversation with a friend and he brought up the topic of wanting to have a kid for the challenge.  I semi-jokingly said to him to find a hobby instead cause at least in that situation the only person that could possibly suffer would be himself.  I then said to him there are only selfish reasons why people want to produce children.  He disagreed with me all the way to the end but without any answers.  If he was in a relationship I wouldn’t have said anything but he’s not so I didn’t care so much.

I can’t blame him for not being able to come up with a reasoning on how having children is not selfish because I don’t think there is any.  Plus, no one really ever encounters anyone who defames the idea of having children so the topic never gets much thought from most people.  If a married couple tells people they don’t want to have kids everyone will ask, “why not? You should.”   When a married or non-married couple tell people they are having a kid soon people always say, “congratulations!”  No one ever says, “you’re so selfish for wanting to have children.”

Reproducing was necessary at one time because it ensured the survival of our species.  It was necessary for the growth and the sustaining of our economic system.  As decades went by, more people became a problem instead of an asset.  Life is not as easy today because there’s more competition.  More people means more demand for jobs and housing but the supply of jobs cannot keep up and property values have become more expensive.  Technology has replaced people which has reduced the need for humans and their worth.

Overpopulation has occurred because it’s so easy to survive.  I want to say that life was never meant to be this way but who knows how life was really meant to be.  It’s just a cycle of one empire ruling and collapsing.  The way of the world operates for the benefit of the wealthy and powerful.  They don’t care if the world is in decline as long as it’s not their world.  That’s also the mentallity of the not so wealthy and powerful.  The only difference is one side has more power to create change.

The motivation for most innovation today is finding new ways on how to sustain life due to the amount of people on this Earth.  It’s all about natural resources being scarce and more valuable.  Finding alternative energy cause the current one is being sucked dry.  We’re encouraged to spay and neuter our pets but having kids is never discouraged even though many of us barely get by economically or sanely.

Bringing a life into this world is a huge commitment.  A commitment that I don’t think is very well thought out.  It’s not a hobby or even a mortgage, where if you are unable to fulfill your end of the agreement, you’re the only one to suffer.   If you sucked as a parent, the world would be lucky if the kid grows up to live a difficult life in an increasingly difficult world.  If the world is not so lucky this kid will grow up to inflict misery on the rest of the world for decades.

It’s odd how you need to go through certified training and have some years under your belt while under the watch from someone certified in order to be considered competent in your industry, yet you’re allowed to become a parent with no credentials at all.

I don’t think any less of people who want children, I’m just saying in our day and age it’s for completely selfish reasons and hardly anyone ever views it in that way.  One can say if people refrained from having kids, someone who may do something great will never have been born.  True.  But that’s probably not the plan for your kid and the odds are enormously slim it will happen.  I could jump into the ocean and maybe come out a mermaid but it’s not likely.   Chances are I will just end up taking a dump in the ocean, wrecking the corals, eating the last dolphin and doing more harm than good.


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