Another Mutt Post

When I don’t have the brain capacity to write much about a single topic but want to write something, I do a Mutt Post.

My delivery route is mostly residential which means I step on a lot of grass which also means a high possibility that I step on dog crap.  I used to step on dog crap on an average of once every month and a half.  It’s very annoying since you don’t know you’ve stepped on it until you drag it in your truck and sometimes into a customer’s building.  It gets all over your gas or brake pedal and it’s difficult to get off cause the pedals have grooves on them.  Sometimes I don’t just step on it but actually stomp on it when I jump out of my truck.  Stepping on dog crap never gets less embarrassing.

When I was in grade 2, there was this kid who stepped on dog crap during break.  A few of us laughed at him and ran away from him.  I couldn’t understand why after running about half a block I could still smell the dog poo.  Yep, I stepped in it too but pretended that I didn’t cause I didn’t want people laughing at me.  I was so embarrassed.  I went to the washroom and the kid I laughed at was in there wiping the crap from his shoe.  We shared a moment.

In grade 8, I came home from school to a mostly dark bedroom.  Near the door was something resembling dog poo.  I stood there just staring at it wondering if it was dog poo or not.  It really looked like it so I picked it up and dropped it once I realized it was dog poo.  I could have avoided it all if I was just smart enough to turn on the light.

It’s really difficult to be completely bored these days.  With the internet you have access to so much entertainment at anytime.  I would have killed to have it back when I was teenager flipping through late night infomercials or daytime soap operas.  I would have been the happiest kid alive, so I think.  I have it now but it doesn’t make me happy.  I think it’s cause everyone else has it too so I don’t feel special.  If you were the only person to have internet, wouldn’t you feel like the luckiest person alive?

Have you heard of Blue Zones?  It’s the name given to places in the world where people live the longest and healthiest.  Okinawa, Japan is one of these places.  It’s said that their longevity is due to their diet consisting of purple sweet potatoes, never retiring from work and being part of a strong community.  In western society we’re obsessed with doing the opposite.  We eat crap and strive for independence.  It’s like we’re trying to be depressed without even knowing it.  When you’re away from any kind of real community like environment for a long period of time, it becomes really difficult to want or be able to get back into one.  Tolerating people becomes like a job that you don’t need.

I went to watch Metallica Through the Never 3D IMAX last week.  It was filmed here in Vancouver when they had 2 shows.  It was pretty rad.  I don’t have much else to say about it.  Wouldn’t I make a great film reviewer?

Well, I’m going to sleep now.  I need good rest or the work day becomes much more difficult to tolerate than normal.  I’d really like a Filet-O-Fish right now from Mcdonald’s.  Maybe Friday night I will live it up and have one.

 

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